Life before becoming a Christian
I was brought up in a Buddhist family and didn’t question what religion was all about. Back then, I knew that my family would go to the temples on occasions to pray, and I would just follow them even though I wasn’t quite sure what was going on. At a young age, I never really thought through this whole concept of prayer. To me, going to the temples meant that I was going to pray for something to be fulfilled. Good grades, great health, and such. And thus, I often followed my parents to ask for these even when I got confused with who exactly I was praying to. Just like a lot of people out there, I felt that I was living life “right”. I wasn’t doing things that the world portrays to be wrong- stealing, rebelling, etc. I thought that if you put me on a scale ranging from good to bad, I would be somewhere in the middle, swinging a bit more to the “good” side (hopefully). What I didn’t realize back then was that no one could really be considered “good”. Even though I wasn’t out-rightly doing bad things, a lot was going on internally that made me “bad”. I had a lot of selfish thoughts, self-righteous thinking, and I only lived to please myself. And yet, I had no motivation or reason not to give in to all these desires. I lived to make myself happy, and whether or not that spilled over to the people around me depended largely on my moods, unfortunately.
How I came to know Christ
The first time I came to know of this man Jesus Christ was through my cousin, Nicole. Nicole and I are very tightly knitted and I often went over to her house for stayovers whenever I could. As my Aunty is a Christian, Nicole was naturally brought up in the faith. I’ll always remember sitting in her room browsing through her children’s bible because I enjoyed reading the stories in them. However, none of them struck a chord with me and I didn’t get on to actually asking her what they all meant. Life went on and I had little interaction with this faith for a long time until a few years ago.
When I first accepted Christ, I knew that it was going to symbolize a change in my life. I wasn’t expecting any thing to happen physically on the spot when I said the sinner’s prayer but I knew that it demanded a change within me. I first came to this decision when I started to make new plans in my life. Back then, I had just received my ‘A’ level results and I knew that I wasn’t going to make it into the university of my choice. The path that I had all along assumed I would take was now blocked out. I had to sit back down with a fresh slate and reconsider all my other alternatives. As I went through that process, I realized that life was going to be different. It was at that point when I was at crossroads that God reached out to me. I started to seek a higher purpose in the way I was living. I began to pose questions to Christians around me and was curious about how they could find such satisfaction in their God. I got more interested as I witnessed them reflecting what they believe in, in their own lives. They inspired me and made me want to find out more about this God that they so passionately believe in. I was blessed to have a few of them follow up with me, and it was many months later that God worked in my heart and I came to accept Christ because I saw no reason in delaying any further when He became my main motivation in life. ￼
Life as a Christian
As the months progressed on, I started to see that becoming a Christian didn’t mean that life was going to get better. In fact, life was a lot harder as I constantly struggled between sin and repentance, flesh and spirit. My eyes were opened to my own sinful nature, and I started to see how selfish I was as I thought back to the days when I had no qualms about fighting for what’s best for myself. Following which, I started on my very bumpy journey into becoming someone more Christ-like. With the spirit, I became very conscious of my own thoughts, actions and behavior, and at times I questioned myself for feeling certain ways because of my sinful nature. Life didn’t “improve” when I accepted Christ. Life became even more challenging as I stumbled back into sin countless times. Through it all, I know that one thing remains. God is, and will always there for me to turn to – be it to cry out for failing to resist sin, give thanks through various situations, talk to during the day, and of course go to in prayer. Whatever I do, I know that my main motivation lies in wanting to please Him and give glory and honour to Him. This is something that I would never have imagined to be in me many years ago. I can feel God working in me to shape me into a person that better reflects His character. Although I’m so far from that now, I know that this is the whole point of my new life – centered around Christ and grounded in His word. Having said that, I’m still praying for myself to hold this truth close to my heart and focus on an identity in Christ and not one that is self-seeking.
How I came to be part of LPPC/things
I like about LPPC I was brought into LPPC by Marcus Ong. Back then, I was still a very new Christian, probably about 3-4 months after I accepted Christ. Church was a very new concept to me and I must admit that I felt really lost back then. I actually saw church itself as a building, or the service that I attended. As the weeks progressed, I began to see church being reflected in the members of LP. Everyone was warm and friendly, always following up with me and being genuinely concerned about my well-being. I saw how LP functioned as a large family, and how everyone was looking out for one another and keeping each other in prayer. Today, I’m grateful to say that I’ve chosen to commit to LP because of all the love that I’ve received here. I’m truly blessed to have forged so many new relationships that seek to edify. As I continue on this long journey through life with everyone else in LP, my prayer is that we will continue to be one big family rooted in Christ, always seeking to build one another up in love and good deeds. To conclude, I’ll leave us with one verse here that will always serve as a great reminder to me- Then He said to them all “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me” Luke 9:23.